End of Seven, Start of Eight

Eight years ago I experienced the perfect delivery. My sweet, accommodating, baby showed up at the perfect time, in a clam setting full of love and support. Megan has since grown into an amazing girl full of beauty and generosity. Megan has an easiness about her and has a profound concern for others. I get so used to her easiness that sometimes it surprises me when she asserts her opinions with determination. I want her to know that I value her opinions, that she is special, and worth-while and each year her birthday is a great opportunity to make sure she knows this. 

Megan choose a Hollywood Movie theme so we sent her friends ticket invitations. We found clap-board plates and movie night napkins. We would have 3 hours to entertain, so Megan, the sisters and I talked over some party games and project ideas. Megan was excited about some of the ideas and had distinct thoughts on how to make them happen. Megs helped me make the cake and was happy to have Bridget participate as well. Then on Saturday she and the sisters helped add the decorations to the cake. I couldn't make it exactly like she wanted but I think she was happy with the end result.

When Meg's friends arrived each made a star for our walk of fame and imprinted their hands, we then had "Chinese food at Mann's Chinese Theater".  Megan got to lead the group in a game of charades. I messed this up though because, ahead of time I had Megan cut up the ideas so she knew them all. She had an unfair guessing advantage. Everyone went and then the the girls wanted to go again. At one point I forgot I told Megan she could go and gave the charade slip to her friend. Megan got really angry with me and wound up in her room in tears.  I got mad that she was angry. Not very mature of me and not productive in getting Megan to come back and enjoy her party. But she did come back out and we switched to a Concession Candy tasting game that Rachael led. We all got back on a happy footing while tasting candy. Then we had them all do a perler bead project (melty beads). We shared cake and ice cream and ended by watching Megan open her presents. Her friends went home happy and we switched to clean up. 

I had really hoped to make Megan feel special but I'm afraid that the party didn't quite accomplish this. There were too many times when either I or Rachael or Emma overrode her idea with a more practical one. We planned all of these things with her but we didn't let her lead. As we said our good nights even though she enjoyed herself at the party I realized that she didn't come away with the special feeling she was looking for. I held my seven year old's hand for one last evening and prayed to do better tomorrow. 

That tomorrow was her 8th Birthday. We made her breakfast in bed, where she was presented with homemade cards and smiling family. Megan wasn't feeling very well so we let her decide if we stayed for donuts after Mass. We didn't and no one complained. There were lots of little birthday comments and wishes as the day went on. We went to the B&O railroad museum for the Brink's birthdays and let Megan decide if we would go on the train ride or head out so she could get to another of her friend's party. We let her pick when to open her gifts and whether or not she wanted to go out to eat. It was little things all day but it expressed to her that we cared what she wanted. I held my 8 year old's hand tonight at bedtime and I could feel her happy grin in the darkness. I hope she has that smile again soon. Sometimes the big plans don't quite accomplish what I hope but I am thankful for the tiny moments in a day that can convey my love.  Happy Birthday Megan! I love you!